Possibly Her Life

2012-02-09T00:02:00.001+08:00

After much consideration, I'm right now embracing my new curly hair. I don't care if i have to spend hours in a salon, I don't care if i roll out of bed and throw it into a ten-minute top-knot, I don't care if i have to run a blow dryer over it and apply the curl enhancer cream every morning now, which simply means i have to wake up much earlier! but there is nothing wrong with wearing my hair the way i like it (:

2012-02-08T23:36:00.000+08:00

@ Clarke Quay

2012-01-31T18:55:00.003+08:00

I know i've been away a while. I really don't know why, I think it must just have been one of those things that happen once in a while. The blog didn't seem such a priority. I will try to rectify that, because I value you reading my blog and I do value having new readers. Besides, having a blog is a way of releasing emotions, like a diary. It is important and I do want to write frequently. Anyway, I'm having a lazy day today. Sometimes your body just needs to relax and take it easy for awhile. All i want to do is curl up in bed with a comforting video from Youtube through my Ipad (: *and nibbling on salty potato chips*

My week has consisted of working quite a little bit, catching up with my old-homie through Whatsapp; whose son has just turned a year old, dating my skinny boyfriend, giggling away and contemplating to continue my studies.Life is dead tough for just an O level holder like me these days, I reckon. Literally every office job I went fo was closed to me (I've given up for the moment). I really want to get on in life, but every year new set of Diploma graduates overtakes me and I am left behind. Well, that's how it feels anyway. So here i am, gearing up for the real thing and storing up enough perseverance to pull me through this long journey. Some people might be thinking I am wasting too much time repeating the same tests over and over again, but i'm still pursuing it for my own sake.

All the best to my dear friend too, who is walking on the same path with me towards reaching our same goal (: I'm honestly very nervous and a little excited to go through a whole new chapter. Well, nothing is impossible.

2012-01-31T17:57:00.003+08:00

2012-01-14T00:26:00.001+08:00

On a depressing note, i feel like a trash right now with all these bright red spots on my face after one session of facial extraction. Do i really have to look at those stupid magazines with tall, stick-like, porcelain white skin models to feel beautiful? They always say; ( it doesn't matter what you look like on the outside,as long as you're a good person,as long as you respect others ). It's been told hundreds of times before, but still my self esteem is pulling me down every second of my insecure life.

I want to have a clear, beautiful skin with no pimples, acne or blackheads :( Am i asking for too much?

Sigh.

2012-01-14T00:00:00.000+08:00

Boyfriend, you have done it all (:

2012-01-13T22:27:00.001+08:00

2012-01-10T21:25:00.002+08:00

2012-01-10T20:48:00.001+08:00

There is never a sudden revelation, a complete and tidy explanation for why some things happened far from what i desire. I'm slowly learning to adapt and let it flow naturally forward in whatever way they like. Reality check, life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. It isn't as bad as how i initially imagined to be working in a totally new environment. Everything will be just fine, i hope. It's a brand new year anyway! There is also nothing more precious than to be in pink of health. Fortunately, I'm blessed with such loving boyfriend who sticks around for almost three months already in every kind of situation, be it good or bad. Let's just say I've found what I've been looking for ((((:

2011-12-04T20:49:00.001+08:00

The best kind of rain, of course, is a cozy rain. It's like any other lazy period, when i feel like sinking in bed a little longer, or read a good book, take early tea with hot chocolate muffins and jam and look out the streaked window with complacency - alone. It has been such a damp and slow Sunday, which is quite rare. I wish it stays this way. I've had a very good rest today after three days of 13 freaking hours shift! While my other colleagues are still battling through the last round, I'm here hoping that we all could hit our high target this month. It is going to be such an intensive December but i can't wait to taste the fruit of our hard labour.

JIA YOU! :)

So, i ordered a sinful feast plus one hot fudge sundae (!!!) for myself since the weather was pretty moody in the afternoon. Thank you McdRider for delivering it over to my house even though it took you almost two hours and i've already lost a quarter of my appetite by then. Geeeeeeeeeeeeeeez!

Tomorrow starts another day of the same routine, just a different route. I have to travel all the way down to Ann Siang Road early in the morning for a training session, sigh.

2011-12-04T12:22:00.001+08:00

The Sunday sun awakes me in perfect calmness. Windows open, birds are free. This is life. I am me, I am blessed. Why worry about the little things when i have all beauty that life brings (:

2011-11-30T02:01:00.001+08:00

There was nothing outstanding about today, i just did a homemade facial treatment for myself. Rather than i spend a big amount on basic facials outside, might as well i invest every penny on natural therapies. Of course, i have to regularly practice it for effective results. Let me just share the benefits of certain ingredients:

Honey: a natural, gently astringent yet extremely moisturizing; refines pores; tightens skin; retards wrinkles;anti-blemish.

Chamomile: tones all types of complexions.

Oatmeal: soothes; heals; relieves itching.

Cucumber: reduces under-eye puffiness; reduces wrinkles.

Egg: conditions; whites best for normal and oily skin; yolks for dry to normal skin.

Nuts: used in scrubs to refine pores and combat wrinkles, blackheads and dryness.

Tomato: unclogs pores.

Vinegar: refines pores; cleans; softens; aids blemishes, itchy skin, and sunburn.

Yogurt: softens, hydrates, and has many enzymes that exfoliate the skin; cleanser; bleach.

Give it a try! (: It definitely could save you from burning a hole in your pocket.

Oh yes, plenty of sleep is also everybody's essential. I'm going to scramble onto my bed like any other five year-old pretty soon. Goodnight, sweet dreams!

2011-11-29T01:40:00.001+08:00

Wow! It feels like it's the season of 'blogging hiatus'. I've been on one and so have the bloggers whose blogs I read. It's like one serious drought out there. Everyone is probably busy moulding their life the way they hope it could be. As for me,I really haven't had that exciting of a life (slowly progressing). There are a lot of things I wish I would have done, instead of just sitting around and complaining about having a boring life. So I pretty much like to make it up. Bridging the gap from my previous post, I'm now already involved in a happier relationship. Sometimes, though,the only way to extricate a tangle is to cut it out and start fresh. However,i never really thought that he will be the one for me after years of regarding each other just as an acquittance. Perhaps that's what we forever love to call it, Fate (:

Two days ago,it was good. Yesterday was fun. The next time we meet,it definitely will be better, right Baby? *blush* I'm glad it's you who finally fills up the empty space in me. I couldn't possibly be asking for more after all the miracles that has been blessed on me. December will be another great month filled with blissful moments with you,i simply can't wait for all that to happen. On a tougher note, i will be extremely busy too handling my current job due to the crazy promotions we're having right now. I'm honestly growing very jaded -__- I wish i could skip it all.Lately,there are swamps of people(!) lingering around Orchard Road and the roads are badly congested with impatient drivers. I simply can't stand it! God,please save me. Luckily,it's my turn to rest on a Tuesday after dragging myself to work for 6 consecutive days(!!) I want to seriously pamper myself with one session of proper facial and hopefully a perfect massage too. I'm suddenly cursed with a heavy breakout on my face early this morning. Geeeeeez!

I want to feel beautiful again :(

2011-09-15T01:05:00.002+08:00

Finally, we're settled for this Saturday outing! I simply am in my highest mood & sex-cited! I'll be on a new ride this time round because my favourite Mitsubishi Colt got into a pitiful accident :( I hope it will be perfectly fine again. Thanks to my super girlfriend, Famie who has helped me to get a Hyundai Getz and a Toyota Wish for my other group of friends this weekend.

Let's celebrate!!

2011-09-14T01:30:00.000+08:00

Hi everyone.

You may have noticed in the last few weeks that my posts have been infrequent and pretty low-quality. I’m working on some major overhaul with my life at the moment, and I have next to no time to devote to my beloved blog. Lately I’ve barely had time to post – in fact I’ve barely been able to read any random blogs at all.

I’m not happy with the current state of things – so i preferred to take a break from blogging for a short time, rather than continue posting content that I feel is mediocre and below the standard that I expect from myself (and that you guys all expect from me). So, rather than force out sub-par posts, I pressed pause on blog – just for a little while. I’d rather step back than write posts that are disappointing.

Now that time is passing by way too quickly than we could imagine,it helps me to forget all those bitter memories just as fast. It wasn't a bed of roses after all. I got pricked by thorns and struggled real hard just to set myself back into the right pavement. Luckily,I'm still standing high and strong. Everything in my world is slowly healing and I'm glad I've finally broken the chain of melancholy.

I'm getting around fine now. I'm single but not available. I'm still earning a living in the same company i've been for almost 7 months now. I meet new,beautiful people. I spent a bomb on shopping, and still highly considering of getting more nice stuffs. I've temporarily put my online store on halt due to poor time management. I've been going out for simple dates. On a happier note, i've been trying to live my life the way i dream it and not the way other people want it to be. I really have to thank my mum (not exactly, but she did listen) & some of my buddies who have stood by me during my grotesque period. I somehow figured that life was always a matter of waiting for the right moment to act. If not,my days will not sail smoothly as planned.

Anyhoos, (not listed according to the degrees of excitement)

- I'll be driving out for a mass 'Jalan Raya' with a group of fun people this weekend. Even though it may seems like a little too late but I'm sure we're going to have a blast!

- I'll be attending a dinner gathering cum birthday celebration organised by my fellow Agnes B teammates at TGIF!

- An off day on my 21st birthday with no plans yet.

- I've also blocked four days towards the end of this month for a short escapade!

*insert big smile*

I'm enjoying every bit of what is left before i leave this world.

2011-05-23T15:52:00.004+08:00

Everything in my life was the same and, once her youth was gone, it would be downhill all the way, with old age beginning to leave irreversible marks,the onset of illness,

...the departure of friends

2011-03-10T23:20:00.002+08:00

"Before I sleep and after I wake up and all the hours in between... you occupy my mind. So, practically every moment of the day you are in my thoughts.

I miss you, Crunchie"

2011-03-10T00:12:00.002+08:00

I need a massage specialist for my bruised leg :( It happened almost two months back,when i was trying to come down the stairs superfast,my feet ahead of the rest of me.The next thing i know,i fell really hard onto the edge of the steps.The hurt felt like a shot,a needle going in right there and spreading out like fire.It hurts so much that i have to get past the ouch of it before i remembered to cry :'( I still dragged myself to BBDC for my practical lesson then.Until today,my right leg is still swollen and i could feel the pain when i gently press on the affected area.Now,i can't dress myself up in skirts and short dresses because of the huge black patch on my leg. Hais. Hopefully,it will get better after I've gotten myself a nice treatment. Not so soon,probably by the end of this month.

2011-03-09T23:59:00.005+08:00

After all, the only way to communicate is to find someone who can comprehend; the only way to be forgiven is to find someone who is willing to forgive.

2011-03-08T23:28:00.000+08:00

~~To acquire my 3A Driving License~~
A trip to Bangkok with HoneyBunny
Carousel Lunch/Dinner Buffet with my Family
A Trip to Perth,Australia with Honeybunny & Afiq (?)
Chanel Vintage Chain Handbag (preferably black colour)
A short shopping trip to KL with Family
Canon EOS 60D
No more job hopping after i have got the one that suits my taste buds
Save at least 8K before the year meets the end
Another pair of Ferragamo Varina Flats (i got the smackin' red already)
Learn Mandarin
Birthday Bash for Honeybunny

I still couldn't stomach the moment when i walked lightly towards my Crunchie (Boyfriend) and hugged him tight before i immediately shed a bucket tears of joy. I felt an awful,overwhelming sense and didn't realise that i should be jumping happily because i finally passed my first TP driving test! I swear,i had mixed emotions from the time i stepped into the Waiting Room until I'm done with the circuit courses and only half of the test route (i only did one U-turn,that's it!). I'm so much happier now (: After I registered for my license,i waited for one particular instructor (Mr Daniel) who took me for my very first lesson. Ever since i started,he never fails to provide me with words of encouragement and treated me like his new best friend. I just wanted to extend my full gratitude and let him know that i didn't disappoint him today. After that,me and Crunchie had our lunch at the coffee shop nearby before heading to Orchard for a movie date. He wanted it to be like a mini celebration for me,so he paid for all expenses. Thank you,B for being there when i needed somebody. Love you so much (: We watched I Am Number Four in Digital at Cathay Cineleisure. Minutes before the show,i actually followed him first to Scape to meet his dance crew members for a short while. Only partial of the group were there,feasting on the KFC Family Feast Meal that my Crunchie bought specially for them. He couldn't wait to activate his dance again after missing few important practices this week itself due to silly circumstance that I've unintentionally created. I'm sorry. Now i want to sleep hard,like a cyclone in her sheets. I'm effing jaded and the thought of having to work afternoon shift tomorrow,ache my legs more.

2011-02-22T01:05:00.003+08:00

So previously, after a great deal of thought, I've decided to take a break from blogging for that period of time. I was too busy,and still am with my new job. I've started the transition to get used to my new responsibilities. I did screw up within that few days after i just started but my new colleagues are nice enough to let me off with only gentle reminders. I'm also very much comfortable with my flexible work shifts because i can see myself going back home earlier than usual. It got even better when i'm invited for their annual Dinner&Dance function at Grand Park Orchard. We (Taka team) collaborated with (Paragon team) and came out with a short skit to perform on that grand day. Unfortunately,we didn't get the title 'Best Performance' and the $500 cash prize. It was awarded to (CT Hall team) who did extremely great in their 'Step Up Hip Hop Dance'. But i didn't return home empty-handed though. I won the 1st prize in their lucky draw! It's a 64GB Ipad :) Gosh,i was darn speechless. Thank you so much!

2011-02-05T00:34:00.002+08:00

I don't feel the same with you anymore :(

2011-01-30T15:17:00.003+08:00

I think everyone is selfish in some way, and everyone should be to some degree. You need to take care of yourself first. If you are concerned that others see you as selfish, you need to first look at the people who are judging you in that way. Do they have an opinion that you value? If not you shouldn't worry about it. That is exactly what I'm doing right now (Don't give a single fuck).

I choose my job.
I choose my career path.
I choose my friends.
I choose my life.

I'm very much thankful that I'm blessed with a friend who totally understands the kind of circumstance I've put myself into. Thanks babe for the nice silver bracelet you gave me yesterday (: That is bonus on top of the whole time we've spent,cracking silly jokes and listening to each other's problems. I treasure them all and definitely will miss you. In return,i bought for her a wallet (I'm glad you like it!).

Moving on,i would have to attend a briefing on Monday at 3pm. Next,i think i would opt to go for my practical lesson rather than going for a hair makeover. I want to clear my last three stages in February itself (hopefully). Prolly i will book for an appointment with my hairdresser after 13th. I'm just happy that I'm starting my new job soon (YEAHHH!!!!).

2011-01-29T01:50:00.002+08:00

Alhamdullillah. I've received my January's pay in the afternoon (: My Honeybunny came down to MBS to fetch me from work at 8.30pm and we went straight to Puma at Somerset 313 while waiting for Afiq (turned single again) to meet us there. I bought a backpack for my 3rd sister and a men's jacket with matching long pants for my Honeybunny. Well,i miss going shopping with him because usually he would be the one who is more sex-cited about buying new things. At times,he will act as my fashion advisor and start choosing nice clothes for me. Sheesh! Next,we went to PastaMania Cineleisure for dinner before we called it a day. I'm jaded already. Tomorrow will be my last day working in MBS and I'm feeling kinda sad now :(

2011-01-28T14:16:00.003+08:00

This is great!! My homie had safely given birth to an adorable little boy (Syaqil Matin) (: I'm extremely happy for you babe!! Insyaallah,me and Zeq will pay you a visit anytime soon to greet your precious gift and your family (:

2011-01-28T12:56:00.003+08:00

After what seems to be a long and boring week,i started to have some fun with Honeybunny,Afiq and his new girlfriend yesterday (who happens to possess the same name as me). I met them at Bugis and we proceeded to the Rex Cinema to watch a Malay nasty horror movie 'Khurafat'. That was one of our double date ideas and hopefully more to come. I got suddenly so afraid when the ghosts started jumping out at me. Honestly speaking,I'm a tremendous scaredy cat.My heart abruptly jumps out of its cavity and lies thumping heavily on the ground.Darn,movies like this really give me premature heart attacks, perpetual nightmares and a paranoia when it comes to dark silent areas! I hate it plenty much but i love the thrill and excitement horror movies provide (??). Rating wise,i would say 3.5/5. After the 1 1/2 hour show,we had a slackin' good time sitting at the parapet outside Bugis Junction and munching on Sour Cream Ruffles for a while before we headed home (: We still have not yet plan for another simple date during CNY.

Anyways,i am pretty sad though to see my Honeybunny struggling through his domestic problems right now. I wish i could do a lot more than just listening and giving him a pat on the shoulder to calm him down. (Don't you worry too much alright,it will be fine someday) I love you.

As for me,I'm in a major dilemma myself. I don't mean to leave this place abruptly but due to unforeseen circumstances,i have to. I'm sorry if it is going to hurt any parties severely knowing that it's entirely my fault. I will miss you the most,babe. Thanks for being the best colleague and friend for the past six months. We had a couple of misunderstanding issues back then but we still work together and in fact become closer each passing days. I hope we will still keep in touch okay (:

You get on a roller coaster expecting to be frightened and challenged and thrilled along the way - and you're never disappointed. At some point, you're going to wonder if getting on was a good idea, but there is no way off, so you just have to go with it and ride the ups and downs and twists and turns and lurches and bumps until you get to the end.

Life, like a roller coaster, can very often take your breath away and bring you right to the very brink.And when it does, the only thing you can is let go of your version of the outcome and trust that everything will turn out all right in the end.

2011-01-25T11:31:00.004+08:00

Admittedly, a controlling boyfriend can make a relationship ten times more difficult to hold on to. I wish i have fairy godmothers who can make everything better in a snap.

There is no such thing as a perfect relationship. Even those who seem like the perfect couple have had to work their butts off to reach that state of bliss. I'm trying hard not to rush the process through. I shall keep things steady and slowly,but surely. Meantime,i need a cheer-up drink badly.

2011-01-23T19:03:00.006+08:00

Cinta Kita
Teuku Wisnu feat. Shireen Sungkar

Inilah aku apa adanya
Yang ingin membuatmu bahagia
Maafkan bila ku tak sempurna
Sesempurna cintaku padamu

Ini cintaku apa adanya
Yang ingin selalu di sampingmu
Ku tahu semua tiada yg sempurna
Di bawah kolong langit ini

Jalan kita masih panjang
Ku ingin kau selalu disini
Biar cinta kita tumbuh harum mewangi
Dan dunia menjadi saksinya
Untuk apa kita membuang-buang waktu
Dengan kata kata perpisahan

Demi cinta kita aku akan menjaga
Cinta kita yg telah kita bina
Walau hari terus berganti hari lagi
Cinta kita abadi selamanya

Jalan kita masih panjang
Ku ingin kau selalu disini

Biar cinta kita tumbuh harum mewangi
Dan dunia menjadi saksinya
Untuk apa kita membuang-buang waktu
Dengan kata kata perpisahan

Demi cinta kita aku akan menjaga
Cinta kita yang telah kita bina
Walau hari terus berganti hari lagi
Cinta kita abadi selamanya

I dedicate this song for my lovable Honeybunny (:

2011-01-20T19:48:00.003+08:00

She (Megan Nicole) definitely has an exceptional talent. I really admire her beautiful voice. You go girl! (:

2011-01-20T16:33:00.003+08:00

Yeah! I have successfully completed Stage 2 of my practical lessons today. I shall now book for DS lesson and Practical Test. I'm also thinking of enrolling for manual driving as well. I hope everything runs smoothly.

2011-01-18T16:44:00.003+08:00

Boredom is totally the major culprit to unhappiness at work. What the heck,I'm fucking jaded! I am also busy wondering if i would be able to make a claim for my long stretch of medical leave. It sucks that I'm stuck here in this company that only offers annual leave for their confirmed staffs. ppffftt! Nevermind,soon I'll be changing to a better site. I'm going to dearly miss my colleagues (Eqa & Jac) though :(

2011-01-17T18:03:00.002+08:00

It is terribly an absurd Monday to begin with (yesterday was just as bad). The only words lingering at the tip of my tongue right now is 'What the fuck!'. Initially,i assumed that my plans would run smoothly. Firstly,I went to send my new set of uniform to the nearest tailor (which was annoyingly expensive!) because mine needed several slight alterations. Then,i headed to ICA Building to retrieve my new passport at about 3pm. On my way there,i dropped by Yio Chu Kang MRT for a while to pass my Honeybunny his hard disks for his dance practice. I thought things were running just fine. It was only when i proceeded next to BBDC for my practical lesson,then i effing realised that i actually got my timings all mixed up. I was supposed to go for my lesson at 15:20! God,i feel like comitting third-degree homicide at that period of time. GGGRRR! It is just way too bad that i am experiencing such rotten luck :/

2011-01-16T23:37:00.000+08:00

I'm partially depressed now. I didn't know how it exactly started; there was a sudden rise in the level of intensity and pressure in our love affair that caused a deterioration of our senses. For that split moment,i thought maybe we forgot to laugh at ourselves. We can become too focused on our problem that we lose sight of the beautiful world around us. I felt really bad at the end of it. I began to question myself: When was the last time we stared at the changing formations of the clouds? We can become so attuned to what we want to listen to that we do not realize how much there is to hear. We touch,but do we really feel? Prolly it is just me who is making big issues out of nothing. But i do wonder,why is it that you keep repeating your same old mistakes? I wish you would pause for a little while and reflect on how much you have accomplished. Seriously,what is it in your bucket? There is only one character which i could think of that describes you best: You're downright fickle-minded. Dig this,sometimes there are sacrifices along the way. Challenging yourself to make sacrifices is to the soul like exercise is to the muscles of the body,you can not get the same results by watching someone else do it. I hope you will think it over.

2011-01-15T19:01:00.002+08:00

I decided to rot at home on a Saturday because i think i have had enough of the outside world. I want to get plenty of rest now while sitting on the most comfortable couch i have ever sat on in my life. Once you sit on it,it sucks you in like quicksand and to get up you would need some help. It may somehow sounds like I'm exaggerating but the truth is i just love wasting time at home.

2011-01-14T14:43:00.002+08:00

It's soothing to hear that my whole anatomy is recovering and i get the pleasure of living happily again (:

2011-01-13T23:45:00.000+08:00

Today,I'm extremely thankful for God's generosity (: He gave me the best kind of miracle that I've always been praying for. Yes,one of my wishes has already been answered (Alhamdulillah). The keyword is: to have faith in Him and yourself. Anyways,after i collected my two sets of brand new uniforms from Chinatown, me and Honeybunny made our way to Central @ Clarke Quay. We had a heavy lunch at BBQ Chicken (Taufiq's workplace). So of course,the total bill didn't really tear a huge hole in my pocket because he provided us his staff benefit (hehe). After which,we waited for Taufiq to finish his work at about 5.30pm and proceeded to Cathay Cineleisure. We watched the supernatural thriller film 'Season Of The Witch' at 7.30pm.

My rating: 3/5

Thank you Brother for the treat (: We then peeked-a-boo at the new spot I'm going to shift to on 1st February before calling it a day. Tomorrow first thing in the morning,i will have to make a trip to SGH for further health check-up. Currently,I'm trying to make myself think positively and not to worry so much of the outcome. God knows better and I'm hoping that it will turn out just fine. On the other hand,my Honeybunny is going to be fully occupied with his work and dance on the later part of Friday. Make sure you have a blast okay (:

I do care and love you so much.

2011-01-12T20:15:00.004+08:00

Instructor: Any questions for me so far?

Me: How is my driving today,Sir?

Instructor: Very good! I can see you are very confident in your driving. You just have to practice more on your lane changing. Don't worry,girls like to hesitate. (!!) Don't be scared,just do it when it is safe to do so.

Me: Okay i will. Thank you (smiling from ear to ear)

Judging from my progression,i believe that i can possess a driving license before May this year. (Insyallah)

2011-01-12T11:02:00.002+08:00

As much as i would like to forget this long string of unfortunate days,I can never erase it from my memory. I left the house on Saturday evening; sulking and shouldering an overwhelming load of excruciating pain in my puny head. My temperature burned up to 39.9 degrees Celsius. I could slowly feel stages of cramps that started to make lumps of pain in my legs. My thighs and buttocks went numb,then ached back to life. My eyes gradually generated some pitiful tears while i was madly shivering in my couch. It was a terrifying moment. I never stop wondering why it abruptly occurred on me. Luckily,my parents were there to come to my rescue and immediately drove me to A&E at SGH. We patiently waited for a solid 7 hours. I was told that i would be placed in the observation ward for another 8 hours to keep track on my condition. (hated this part) I've honestly wasted a quarter and a half of my youth. The next morning,i didn't get any better. It sucks. I didn't want to stay any longer but i had to. I was pushed to one ward after the other,not knowing where exactly am i supposed to be. That's just one of their bad points. To top it all off,i was not properly examined by a specific doctor and their newly enrolled nurses are unpleasantly rude. I got an effing shock when they don't even know how to handle their surgery needles professionally. They even yelled (loudly) when communicating with a few difficult patients. It seems like I've been trapped there for months. I couldn't take it anymore. Me and my dad made a huge fuss out of it and only then they tried to take things seriously with me. Up to this date,they are still not sure of what I'm suffering from. Haven't i wasted enough resources already? Ggggrrr. Now that I've been discharged because i insisted to,i feel extremely better and healthier. I still have to take their antibiotics regularly though to avoid further complications. I would have to make a trip to SGH again this fourteenth to obtain my blood test results. Hopefully,it's nothing so severe. It may have been tough on me but i never fail to look on the bright side. If it wasn't because of that unlucky state,i will never realise how much they actually care for me. They are my family themselves,my Honeybunny & his friend (Taufiq) and last but not least my future brother-in-law (maybe). I am so thankful that they are part of my life. I'm not afraid anymore. Nevertheless,i believe that God won't put me to a test that is too much for me to bear. He is always fair (:

P/S: I'm on 10 days medical leave.

2011-01-12T10:04:00.002+08:00

" Life.

It's so simple yet so complex.

So cliche'.

So novel.

Refreshing & terrible. "

2011-01-01T19:25:00.000+08:00

I'm prolly an eccentric person therefore have a harder time fitting in. i I hate crowded places and big parties. I'm not a social butterfly and I'm really unsure of the social rules of conduct in those situations. I hate talking to people i don't know. I have this fear of doing something wrong and being judged and/or getting into trouble. So on a lighter note,i didn't enjoy the parts where we three had to squeeze through in between the tiny gaps just to move an inch further. The whole lighted city was heavily congested with drunken party-goers and the kind of people whom i never wish to bump into but i did. Ughh,it was terrible. Luckily we did something else more fun before we got stuck in that unlucky circumstance. After i finished work at 8:30pm,we went for three-rounds of bowling game until midnight. Yes,i missed the colourful fireworks but we had a small celebration ourselves over at the bowling arena. It was simple yet very memorable. Thanks Afiq for the treat (: Then,we had our supper at Lau Pau Sat after hours of struggle. Sadly,that was not our worst period of the day yet. We had to walk down the streets from City Hall-Clarke Quay-Chinatown because we couldn't get any taxi. It was so frustrating (!!) Everyone stood in the middle of the dangerous roads to flag for a cab,and we didn't want to be left stranded in the middle of nowhere either. Hence without further hesitation,we ran towards the cab that came to a halt on the second lane and hopped in. Fuhhh! It really did end tragically :\

2010-12-31T16:46:00.001+08:00

My forth runner-up inspiration:

She is my every reason why I'm so in love with you, CHANEL.

2010-12-31T01:14:00.004+08:00

It is so much convenient now to update my online diary regularly because i didn't mention earlier that my HoneyB bought for me a mini lappy as Christmas gift. My father grew effing mad the other day because he dangerously forbids the idea of celebrating Christmas. It's not like as if i even attend to church's gathering,house parties that definitely will have bottles of champagne and some other kind of substances that could turn me bad overnight (!!) Simply speaking,my dad seems to dislike everything. We may be staying under one concrete roof but i feel like i never really know who he really is. Sadly,what he fails to understand from day one is that i am very true to my religion even though i admit that i don't religiously pray five times a day everyday like what is required. I am just like any other humans who are only fallible. That's that about my grumbling dad.

Luckily i had a satisfying Thursday with the other two musketeers (HoneyB & Afiq),else my week would have been less meaningful. We had simple plan that lasted us until 10pm. I bought for myself two different coloured pants at FEP,a box of Brands Prune Essence,new released Malay movie:Cuti Cuti Cinta DVD and two pairs of earrings,one necklace and black feather headband from Diva (sales items). As for HoneyB,he bought orange and pink (mine!) fluffy key chains that costs him close to fifty(!) bucks. It's such a sore knowing that he spent so much on fake furs. But i absolutely like it. Thanks Baby (: Last but not least,we had a scrumptious dinner at Jalan Kayu Cafe. I ordered my all-time favourite Indian food, Chicken Dum Briyani and it tasted so good! I'm loving it! We all then headed home safely.

On the 31st,we three are going to have our own way of celebrating the new year. I know I'm going to enjoy every bits of it.

2010-12-29T00:54:00.006+08:00

Let me just pen down my 2011's resolution in random order so that i will not tangent off from my desired aims.

To acquire my 3A Driving License
A trip to Bangkok with HoneyBunny
Carousel Lunch/Dinner Buffet with my Family
A Trip to Perth,Australia with Honeybunny & Afiq (?)
Chanel Vintage Chain Handbag (preferably black colour)
A short shopping trip to KL with Family
Canon EOS 60D
No more job hopping after i have got the one that suits my taste buds
Save at least 8K before the year meets the end
Another pair of Ferragamo Varina Flats (i got the smackin' red already)
Learn Mandarin
Birthday Bash for Honeybunny

I am definitely a tasteful dreamer (:

It's not very original,but at some point of time i felt i needed some reachable goals in my life.

2010-12-28T23:23:00.000+08:00

Due to one particular reason,i turned down the offer at Royal Selangor. However,i didn't leave the place empty-handed. In fact,the guy who interviewed me sincerely gave me fruitful advices for at least half an hour. I am more than satisfied to be sitting there and listening to his two cents worth. It's incredible how one perfect stranger would regard you like their own and knows what is best for your future. We thanked each other and i left with no regrets.

2010-12-28T18:19:00.002+08:00

My current earcandy:

Rihanna- Only Girl (In This World)

What's in my scrambled mind right now:

How will my Royal Selangor interview turn out to be tomorrow
To stay positive
To stop myself from assuming things that never happened in the first place
Will i receive my pay tomorrow in the afternoon

I've never been to this place named 'conclusion' because that is simply where u got tired of thinking. My undersized brain is constantly loading matters and transmitting hopeful thoughts into my veins. That's what has been keeping me real busy. I never stop worrying. I prolly need a fun therapy after so long stuck with busy work schedule. Speaking of which,I am going to meet my HoneyBunny tomorrow after my interview (yeah!). I miss him terribly. We don't really have a structured plan yet on how we are going to spend the rest of our Wednesday but i bet I'm going to have the best time of my life (:

2010-12-17T17:53:00.002+08:00

In approximately 8 more painful days,I'm running away to join a different circus. My reason of leaving: It Sucked.

2010-12-14T11:27:00.002+08:00

I'm now wishing hard for a rare miracle for this coming Thursday. Ohmy, pretty please!

Updated News: Duty-free luxury goods at Malaysia by early next year (:

2010-12-12T20:15:00.003+08:00

I am going to finish my Sunday soon and be done with it. I have done what I could. Unfortunately,some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; I'll just forget them as soon as i can. (Azizah,you're such an asshole!). Tomorrow is a brand new day. I shall begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be cumbered with anymore nonsense. & Honey,i miss you too much already :(

2010-12-11T23:46:00.004+08:00

I've been off the map for almost four weeks already! Fuhhh. I am still as fit as hell. My constitution is amazing. I am only too lazy to update my blog space. Just two nights ago,I've been scrounging through my closet for any old pieces of shirts/dresses i probably already bought,but have totally forgotten about it. The shocking fact is,i have plenty of them still wrapped nicely in shopping bags. My mum would have strangled me if i tell her again that i have nothing else to wear *-* Sidetracking,I've been a workaholic. I am always occupied with different tasks each day and it is slowly getting even tougher. At times i never ask for a lighter burden,but for broader shoulders to stack up all those responsibilities. I ever thought of calling for defeat,but the voices in my head whispered otherwise. Luckily,i am still able to stay mentally intact. My Love has been my only pillar of strength while the other part of my world keep scrutinizing my every moment,including my own parents. They simply never understand what are the circumstances I've put myself into. They hardly supply me with a pinch of courage or even a tiny piece of nice thought. I am so confused. I could only allow hot tears of frustration to roll down my cheeks each time they make me feel hopelessly miserable. It seems like it doesn't even matter to them anymore if I'm doing good or bad. Hais, I'm jaded. Anyway,i bought that Audio-Technica ATH-PRO700 GD Gold DJ Monitor Headphone for my sweetheart the other day. He was extremely overjoyed until he almost left me behind because he was busy flaunting his new toy. Ggggr!

Now I'm wondering, when will i be getting mine?
If only Santa truly exists.

2010-11-25T00:56:00.002+08:00

Darn. i hate nick of time changes passionately because it literally means that i have to reconsider my intentions that i've implanted for that specific period of time *-* Why can't things run smoothly as planned?

2010-11-23T20:32:00.003+08:00

Yeah! I made it through my FTT. It really feels really good. Finally i begin to learn that perfect practice really does make perfect (:

2010-11-18T21:32:00.001+08:00

If you were to ask me this: "What do you usually do when I'm gone?"

I would gladly answer: "Wait for you to come back."

2010-11-18T19:47:00.002+08:00

I lost control, yesterday, somewhere between sunrise and sunset, within ten golden hours, each set with sixty diamond minutes. The words spilled suddenly and unexpectedly, came out before i could yank the leash. I wished i could take them back. Swallow them. But they were out. All nothing but the truth. It's just too bad, pickle. Who told you to step on my side of the block? There's a lotta things about me you don't know anything about, pickle. Things you wouldn't understand. Things you couldn't understand. So please get your facts darn right beforehand. I'm tired of smiling- artificially to begin with, whenever you are around. It's high time to get rid of the rotten apple in the small barrel. By then, my world would be going great. Call me evil. Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn.

Alright, my negativity is getting to its brim already. Let's not dwell on that anymore. I think I've had more than one cup of sweet revenge for the week. I must start being me again. I miss my Bf so much more now. He has to work for a long stretch of days before he can finally have a good rest. Sigh, poor thing. I love you sweetheart. Yeah, it goes without saying (: Meanwhile, I'm mentally preparing for FTT this coming week. Once it is cleared, i can then just concentrate on my practical lessons. Hopefully, i could earn a license by February. I am indeed very pleased that I've skipped this far and still making the effort to realise my dreams. Of course,it comes with pure hard work. I don't get expenses from my parents anymore, i dig for every cent myself. If God willing, i would love to bring my whole family for holiday. Hmmm, soon maybe.

2010-11-15T21:26:00.002+08:00

Everybody's hell is different. It is not only fire and pain. The real hell is when my life accidentally goes wrong. I incredibly don't understand why i have to put up with mean and hateful people every now and then? She turned out to be exactly who i thought she were. I never pretended to be somebody else. It's been me all along. & it was me whom you bitched about in front of them. Look,I'm not here to just plainly grumble unnecessarily,okay? I want you to know that i know what it feels like to be afraid to show who you are. I was,but I'm not anymore. & the thing is,i really don't effing care what people might think about me because i believe in myself. & i know that things are going to turn out good eventually.Even though to such critical extent whereby i have no family,no job and no money for anything at all- it is still you that i feel sorry for, Ayu.

Higher power, please give me some sunshine.

2010-11-05T03:26:00.001+08:00

My 9th Nov is pretty much occupied:

2nd Practical Lesson
Practice Lesson
Practice Lesson again
Evaluation for Final Theory Lesson
Finally, a date with Sugarbaby

Darn, I'm fatigue. But well, it's all for a good cause (:

2010-10-28T11:19:00.003+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MUM (:

It is indeed a big milestone to turn forty-(0-9). Hopefully, you've learnt that it is high time for you to counter the amount of bad tempers you've been possessing & try not to make me feel so miserable okay? *Laugh Out Loud* I may not yet have all the money in this world to get for you one perfect gift but at least i know that the silent cake-cutting session,accompanied with KFC family feast on that night did make you smile (: I love you, for now.

2010-10-27T23:22:00.002+08:00

I am sure that it is going to be such an exhilarating Saturday:

Going to BBDC for my Final Theory Lessons (1 & 2).
Attending SHIMA & HASSAN'S WEDDING! with Sugar.
Quench my thirst for movie with again, Sugar.
& the rest of the day with Sugar completes the whole course.

This is what i regard as pure bliss (:

2010-10-26T00:10:00.006+08:00

I have never begin a post with more misgiving. pffft!

I was hoping for something extraordinarily great to happen that can definitely add a beaming smile to my blue-bitten Monday. Sadly, nothing much. I had such a soporific day at work because there was totally no crowd over at The Shoppes at Marina Bay Sands. I spaced out most of the time and basically running on a very poor mood. I could only keep myself busy wondering why is our business getting slower recently. This is really not what i've been hoping for. It was so quiet and to such critical extent, i was allowed to leave work so much earlier. Geez, i wish i could stop worrying but i can't because it is going to affect my coming pay cheque :/

Well, on a brighter note, here is a list of movies (in random order) i wish to watch with Boyfriend probably this coming week:

Paranormal Activity 2

Life As We Know It

Town

Piranha ( Can you allow me in please? I am turning 21 soon. eeerrr)

The Social Network

Due Date

Baby, i miss you even more each day. You know that,right? mmm.....24cm (:

2010-10-20T22:49:00.000+08:00

Love is swift, sincere, pious, joyful, generous, strong,

patient, faithful, prudent, long-suffering and courageous.

Love is everything it's cracked up to be.

He is the one who calls me beautiful instead of hot, who calls me back when i hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to my heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch me sleep. The one who kisses my forehead, who wants to show me off to the world when I'm in sweats, who holds my hand in front of his friends, who thinks I'm just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding me of how much he cares & how lucky he is to have me. The one who turns to his friends and says, that's her. I don't know how to thank my lovely boyfriend- to whose opinion i am addicted - for his exceptional kindness and grace.

For your patience and understanding,

I will always love you,

Zeq.

Happy 13th (:

2010-10-19T20:21:00.002+08:00

Sigh, since there is nothing much may be done in those little shreds and patches of time which my Tuesday produces, I'm just going to stand here like a fool for another one solid hour before i can officially knock off from work. I thought of going facebook-ing but hell yeah,it's gradually turning sour already (same goes for Formspring). God! i am growing so jaded now. On a random note- I terribly miss you, Nurul :( How i wish you know how much you really matters to me.

2010-10-18T21:19:00.002+08:00

Sigh, I've been feeling so debilitated for the past few days. To top it all off, i almost lost my voice too. I swear it sucks to the outermost core. I hate being sick and suddenly turn out to be so helpless. Thank goodness,I'm slowly recovering. Before i even landed on such pitiful situation, I've reserved a partial of my free time to go for the Prada interview last week. I was pretty much excited with their whole process of selecting the best candidate for their available positions, yet at the same time i can't safely vouch that i would be one of those lucky ones.I made it to the 3rd round but ever since then,i have not yet received any positive call. Well after all, it was still a great experience for me. Despite the fact that i really do enjoy the kind of work I'm doing right now,I'm just trying to secure a job that pays me a little bit higher. Let's face it, we all work for money. So if there is a better catch out there, why not? At the very moment,I'm just going to keep on wishing for miracles. I am indeed very thankful that i had a bucket of support from a few of my substances,including my Boyfriend even though there is this certain person whom I've wrongly trust. I had the story,bit by bit,from various people,and as generally happens in such cases,each time it was a different story. I simply can't understand why she can be a bit sore about the opportunities I've been receiving. Yes,life is horrifyingly unfair but i never expected that she would play dirty behind my back. I am dead disappointed with you, girl. Oh,there is pain in life that you can hardly put a name to it.

2010-09-30T03:40:00.001+08:00

" There is never a sudden revelation,

a complete & tidy explanation

for why it happened,

or why it ends,or why or who you are.

It comes in bits & pieces,

& you stitch 'em together wherever they fit,

and when you're done you hold yourself up,

& still there are holes

& you're a rag doll,invented,imperfect.

& yet you're all that you have,

so you must be enough.

There is no other way. "

2010-09-06T01:44:00.002+08:00

Alright, please do kindly ignore the critical content that was being translated in my previous post. It's totally my bad. I didn't mean to point fingers at him every time things don't flow smoothly according to my expectations. We are leading a pretty healthy relationship so far despite all the unexpected mishaps that tends to occur at a certain juncture. I love the way he tolerates my worst behaviours even though he already had such a grotesque day before he sees me. That's my precious boyfriend (: Love you.

2010-09-01T01:34:00.002+08:00

Baby,I'm so gonna bash your brains in. I'm so gonna bash 'em right fuck in! I am absolutely not delighted when you repeatedly misled me with your lies. After everything i had done, this is the summation of my generosity: a disappointed girlfriend. I swear i don't deserve this kind of affection. I've never wished for someone so perfect but why am i always being treated like a fool? This relationship should not have begun in the first place if i knew that you are going to hurt me over and over again.

2010-08-31T01:29:00.003+08:00

Syukur Alhamdullilah. I feel considerably blessed now. I just received my pay and I've gingerly calculated the amount of money I've to start depositing into my savings account. Hopefully,i could clear all the leftover debts before the end of this year. I want to gain access to financial freedom and lead a luxurious lifestyle before i grow antiquated or get sick and then die.

2010-08-29T04:16:00.000+08:00

I'm already a part of a brand new world right now because i still have not get my real sleep yet. It's already 5:33am and i feel just as fresh as yesterday. I'm now feeling awkwardly unstable. It's hard to tell. But i probably have my own reasons- weird and creepy reasons,the kind of reasons you really don't want to know,or at least hope you will be able to forget quickly if i ever happens to tell. I don't even remember what day it was,or what month even that I've been on cold shoulder with my own biological mum.i just can't forgive her for never loving me the way i needed.Fuck yes,I'm being too critical. But whenever mum struck me,it was as if she were taking her aggressions out on a rag doll. I purposely hold in my tears,refusing to cry but can't stop wondering 'why me?'. these two little words have been on the tip of my tongue for most of my life. Today is one of those times i really mean it though. With all my heart,liver,kidneys,lungs - hell,my entire anatomy! Don't get me wrong,i love my mum- hey,i would kill for her. But I'm not into blind,unconditional devotion. I hate the way she persistently tries to run my life and make me live her stupid dreams. The further i ponder upon it,the more my grief compounded. Sometimes,it is just too much to bear. Oh well, happy families are all alike,every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. Hais, I'm terribly upset. The best part of it all is,I'm not totally affected by it. I have to continue doing the things I've planned to achieve. Recently,i got a perfect score for my BTE and i can't wait to clear my BTT so that i can get my hands on that steering wheel. I'm now hoping for only the best. Last but not least,I'm truly sorry Mel for not attending your daughter's birthday party. Please do extend my warm wishes to her alright.

Happy Birthday Dear Claire (:

& of course, i love you Baby.

2010-08-25T00:23:00.000+08:00

Aye, i just signed up for FS for no bloody reason.

I'm just freaking bored being at home entire day.

Sigh!

2010-08-24T21:42:00.000+08:00

It's honestly scary how i began to realise that the dates in calendar are closer than they appear. While I'm excited about August coming to an end,as it is going to draw me closer to my first year anniversary with SugarB/my 20th birthday,i am also a little nervous as we have no control of the next outcome. It may be unfair,but what happens in a few days,sometimes even a single day,can change the course of a whole lifetime. Of course,i want to forever live in that contented state if God allows me to. In fact,if this is even possible,i want so much more time to spend with my SugarBaby even though we meet each other almost everyday. I miss him dearly the moment we said goodbye. That is what being in love means to me. Hopefully,he could adapt into his new working environment without facing any major difficulties. "I will always wish you the best in,whatever at all". I,on the other hand,have my own goals to hit. Once I've cleared my BTE by this Friday,my shoulder of worries would feel a bit lighter -_-

Anyway,i may not be closely related to any of the innocent victims in the Manila Hostage Crisis,but i feel brutally sorry for all the lost. The Philippine police and government are totally fucking incompetent. What a shame!

2010-08-24T21:28:00.004+08:00

" In your life,you meet people.

Some you never think about.

Some,u wonder what happened to them.

There are some that you wonder if they ever think about you.

& then there are the few you wish

you never had to think about again.

But you just do" .

2010-08-06T03:01:00.000+08:00

"This life is what i make it. No matter what, I'm going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is i get to decide how I'm going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they'll come and go too. & yeah, I hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can't give up because if you give up, you'll never find your soul mate. You'll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don't, then who will? So i keep my head high, keep my chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about."

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they go right. You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart, so that better things can fall together." Thanks Ayu, Eqa, Pei Teng & MashamBoyfriend for going the extra mile to show your amount of concern towards me. Darn,I'm unbelievably touched. teheeeees (=

2010-08-06T01:55:00.000+08:00

I'm a liar because i won't tell you everything

I'm stupid because sometimes I'm wrong

I'm ugly because my face isn't perfect

I'm a pushover because i like making people happy

I'm a loser because I'm not a friend with your group

I'm fake because I'm too nice

I'm weird because I'm not like you

I'm insecure because i care about what people think of me

I'm no fun because I'm not always hyper?

Don't try to tell me who i am

BECAUSE

i already know.

2010-07-29T14:20:00.000+08:00

Ermz. Today's Thursday is going to be such a slack.Due to out-of-money circumstance,i have to abort whatever kind of plans i have in mind because i can't seem to have fun with no penny in my Charles & Keith pink wallet. I am now feeling so unfortunate,hais. It's okay,i don't mind.I am going to grow richer in six days time anyway. Then,I'll be happ(:ier again. I don't have to worry about my transportation fares to work,I can save a fraction of my pay to get that Samsung Galaxy without contract. Well,i am still highly considering if it is worth the catch. Next, i can watch the three dimensional 'Street Dance' movie with my move-your-ass-freak Boyfriend. Okay,that's it. I am a pure bummer when it comes to saving and i never know why. If only the bankers would automatically freeze my account when i bridge my cash flow limit, i wouldn't have to worry this much.Lucky i have my Boyfriend even though he is totally not good at it himself.At least he provides me with his listening ears.By now he should know that i enjoy whining about every single thing no matter what time it is. Speaking of him,i was so shocked last night when he appeared in front of my store at MBS to pick me up after work. You're so lovely, i miss you.

2010-07-26T02:38:00.000+08:00

Wooosh,i just did break a record of being forty-five minutes early for work.It is super impressive.Then,i started to feel frightened all over again.I hate first days because i would appear so dumb and clueless and absolutely lonely.Except the fact that i failed to open an amount of sale today,everything else is fairly good.It is okay,i can always try harder.I believe there is no harm in taking baby steps towards a great success (: Then,my Monday is going to be such a splendid because i would be rotting at home again. Fuuh,my whole legs need a recharge after a long day balancing on my black killer heels.God,it was darn torturing.I almost get blisters all over my feet. Yikes! I guess i shall just stick to my two-inches heels.

Hais, for a moment i miss my boyfriend's exquisite voice which continues to survive and thrive and move me to tears.I wished he had stayed on the telephone line a bit longer. Have fun at work tomorrow okay? I am always here praying that you'll be fine. muah! love you.

2010-07-25T01:28:00.000+08:00

My Saturday was pretty much average.I get excited when i suddenly saw Baby on the projector screen because it appeared like as though he was saying 'Hi' to me from a distance.I enjoyed the enchanting performances very much,or prolly because my Baby is in that scene.i laughed hard when Baby shake hands with the fake president.& I also managed to waah,waah,waah in awe,when the colourful fireworks exploded beautifully in the dark skies. Thank you Famiezah for accompanying me, it feels really good to meet up with you again,reminisced about the past and catch up with what we've missed in each other's life.

Alright,that's it for now. I need to get some sleep before i activate my new job tomorrow. Yup,it is so abrupt. The supervisor smsed me in the afternoon and asked if i could start earlier. Why not since i am going to be lonely on a Sunday anyway?. Baby,you have fun dancing all day long kay,hehe. I am on the other hand,feeling terribly nervous. pfft!

2010-07-23T01:07:00.000+08:00

Hello all. I have finally resuscitate and breathing life again into a dying animal after forty-five days of playing dead.I never really intended to take that long of a hiatus.My first thought before this was to just ground it to a halt, but i guess this is me.The canvas of my life,a perfectly encapsulated morsel of the good and bad past.So tonight,I put in a tad more effort to stay up later to blog.

I look noticeably fine but I've been emotionally and physically drained.When people approach me, they only see my surroundings, themselves or figments of their imagination- indeed everything and anything except me.Despite all,i am still growing to be stronger.It happened that I get a lump of disappointed expectations and thwarted ambitions along the way,accompanied with the feeling of total defeat.Yet, I'm not giving up.I also have of course a mix of satisfactory moments and a whirlwind of joy especially with my BabyPrince.It is as if i am in a bowl of endless mysteries.I don't hate the kind of journey I'm currently leading,i just want to walk on clearer paths and be in a happier disposition.I want to be in a comfortable home,unite some of the best blessings of existence and live nearly twenty-years in the world with very little distress or vex me.I bet it is harder to achieve than said. All this worries I've been weighing is like a rocking chair; it keeps me busy,but gets me nowhere. Geez,i need a cheer-up drink badly.

Now, I've to aim for a constant series of trade-offs.I must dump all those unnecessary garbage that is seriously bothering the hell out of me so that i could have more room for positive outcomes.That is why I've decided to work doubly hard in my new job.No doubt, i miss working in Zara with nicest bunch of colleagues even though we tend to create a fair bit of casual misunderstandings within ourselves.that was how i learnt that people can be two-faced,a lesson i never forgot.Hopefully,i would make better friends in MBS. Okay,now I'm so much nervous for my first day. God,please help.

Nevertheless,i know you'll be there for me,right Baby? That's why i love you.He is always by my side when I'm so alone and needed a partner to have fun with.We watched Despicable Me twice together,we walk around hunting for food to please our grumbling stomachs,we go for window shopping and many more.Just the both of us,and it feels terribly great! He himself has been making a lot more progression lately and i must say I'm really proud of you from the beginning you told me you want to change,for the better.Ever since then,i have faith in you no matter how slow the changes would take its place.Love can move a person to act in unexpected ways and lead them to overcome the daunting obstacles with a startling heroism.He is definitely the best,among the rest (: Muah!

2010-06-09T01:17:00.000+08:00

(: My Tuesday with Bf was more than impressive. I felt good in my mini black dress with chunky colourful bead bracelets cuffed on my both hands & Bf looked so stunning in his Korean Hip Hop Style. Firstly,we travelled to Toa Payoh to get Baby's new Rose Pink PSP. I hope you like it the way it is,alright? Honestly i believe it costs nothing compared to what you've sincerely done for me. Thank you for being there every passing days,i love you even more. Then,we went to Bugis & effortlessly spent on anything that is nice. I swear,that was the greatest pleasure.

I couldn't stop myself from choosing,trying and flagging that NETS card to the cashier. If only I'm a lil richer,i would have bought more things for Bf too. Oh well,there is always another pay day for as long as I'm not lazy to go to work. Yes! That reminds me of a piece of brilliant news. Bf finally got a job! I'm too happy right now. He will never understand how much i care about his near future. In fact at times,I'm the one who worries the most. So at the moment,my only one wish is to see him doing well & be happy always. * muah! * After hours of shopping,we headed to Causeway Point for a movie. We watched 'Nightmare On Elm Street' which didn't really leave me with any kind of impression. Never mind,I'm more excited about the upcoming Twilight Saga:The Eclipse on 1st July. I definitely can't wait.

hmmmm.
okay goodnight.

2010-06-05T00:58:00.000+08:00

I think, there is hardly a person in the world who is not familiar with the following situation. Early morning, your alarm clock is ringing, you wake up and the first thought that comes to your mind is something like this: “Oh, no! It was such a great dream that I was seeing… I’ll stay in bed just two minutes more, nothing is going to change for just two minutes…” & there you go fall into deep sleep again. This was exactly what happened earlier today. I will still blame it on my flat-batt hand phone because that is my only alarm device that i always rely on. In the end,i was able to reach my workplace at 7:38am,leaving me with only 2 effing minutes to spare for the rest of June. The whole idea is that i cannot be late for more than 10 minutes,if not they will strip off my $500 allowance. It is darn tough for someone like me who is never punctual. Or,i could depict another similar situation-it happened the day before actually.I was randomly watching the shows on every channel. I looked at my clock and saw that it was time for me to start getting ready for a movie date with Bf but i enjoyed watching teevee so much and can’t find motivation to give up watching. I guess this is a typical fight between the things we have to do and the things we truly enjoy doing, and it’s a habit of many typical latecomers to make a choice rather for the things they enjoy doing. He was fucking pissed of course. It's not my first time anyway. Gosh,i really have to put an end to this sickening habit of mine. Or else,i might lose his trust and more importantly my job. So that is my new resolution for the week & hopefully it stays for lifetime.

Let's just change topic. I had abort few very good plans indeed with my best girlfriends due to some unforeseen circumstances which i won't elaborate. (that includes lack-of-money circumstance) That's truly bad because I've been wishing to spend time with them after so long. Sigh,only Heaven knows how much i miss my pretty bitches. Very well,i shall wait till next week for better plans (:

& I miss you bushuk.

2010-06-01T15:29:00.000+08:00

Hais, how is that mothers today have grown so depraved? (Maybe, it's just my mum.) That question has caused me considerable distress. It's like there is no way out of this problem, at all. She is probably not smart enough. In fact,she is born a loser. Oh? Do you think I'm being too critical? It never even occurred to me. Why am i so unforgiving when it comes to my mum? Let's just keep that question in mind as i go along, shall we?

So yeah,I've been very negative lately. It's not that i choose to put myself into such situation but at times,hell just keeps stirring into your life. It seems like my pray for smoother days has not been answered. Yet,i believe God doesn't give you more than one little piece of the story at once. You know,the story of your life. Otherwise your heart would crack wider than you could handle. He only cracks it enough so you can still walk,like someone wearing a cast. But you've still got a crack running up your side,big enough for a sapling to grow out of. Only no one sees it. NOBODY SEES IT. Everybody thinks you're one whole piece,and so they treat you maybe not so gentle as they would if they could see that crack. Hopefully, all this shit is just going to be temporary. The next fine day,i try to tangent off from all these melancholy by acting like it never happened. I continue earning money like any other days and meet my Bf almost every night. He has been the best cure for all my sucky days. At this period of time,he is the only one who understands if I'm in need. He never fails to bring me food for lunch even though he has to travel all the way down from home. I love my every moment with you, i truly do. Of course,i make it clear to myself that the clock cannot be argued with and that when it is time to leave for work,for him to attend to his dance practices,then these changes are as incontestable as the tides. I want him to succeed in all his strongest points. If it really is his wish to pursue his passion in dance,so be it. I just have to slowly change my ill perception towards dancers & support him throughout his journey.

i love you.

2010-05-20T18:03:00.000+08:00

Here is my piece of mind for you, my only one.

Boyfriend,

I promise to always tell you what's real
when you want to hear the truth.

I promise to be your dream catcher
to chase away your every fear.

I promise to be your smile
when you're frowning.

I promise to always cheer you up
when you're down and blue.

I promise to give you faith
when you're feeling insecure.

I promise to keep you sturdy
when you are feeling unsafe.

I promise to listen
when you need to talk.

I promise to tell you no lies
just what is true.

I promise to always lend you my shoulder
when you need to cry.

I promise to always hold you
when you need someone.

I promise to always care for you
wherever you are,
I promise to always be there.

I promise to never hurt you and never break your heart.

I can't promise you the world
I can't promise you the sky
I can't promise you that we will never fight
I can't promise you that i will never cry

But i can promise you that i will always be true to you

& Bf i promise that i will always love you more than anything with all my heart,
no matter what happens or what we go through.

Happy 8th month,muah!

2010-04-20T19:28:00.000+08:00

“The most interesting thing about heart transplant is that one completely loses his own heart and be replaced with someone else’s yet still has the feelings for the same person he/she loves. This proves that love works in the minds of people and not in their hearts. Bottom line is, love is a state of mind. You’ll learn how to forget only if you try doing so… – Dr. Burke, Grey’s Anatomy”.

It's now my turn to speak about serious 'till-death-do-us-part' stuff.

My boyfriend has been feeding me on a diet of romantic dreams just as though he is giving me candy. There were times i feel that either one of us wasted it all away to nothing just because of some concrete arguments that never should have constructed in the first place. Ever since then,i try to pick myself up and bring myself back to the same old Hanisah that you knew. I want us to live in a happy and contented state again. & there you are trying to wash away all the painful melancholy inside me.You never did whine. I wonder how you could be so good at it as if you've never been hurt.Baby,you're simply amazing.

I love you,

Happy 213th (:

2010-04-18T01:15:00.001+08:00

i am still aspiring to be a hedonist.

If only i could be alive again in these memorable pictures,i would have wished for that moment to stay much more longer- or maybe forever. It's pathetic enough that I've not been to any greater parties than that night but i enjoyed every portion of it. It was even sweeter when my 'geek in pink' boyfriend did tag along to my Sugababe's 21st memorable event.It may have lasted for weeks already,but i will always hope that you'll be blessed with only blissful moment and better companions to get you through your hardest days (: Well,that's what happened in the starting month of April. Apart from that,my world has not been so colourful- same goes to my blog that has been left stagnant for quite a while now. So i decided to create a new look with my wallpaper except for the boxes because i want to keep it simple.That's me,i love simplicity in every sense of the word. Okay,I'm running out of ideas. Actually,I'm kinda dying to share about my current,sickening work experiences. It isn't that bad though,just slight clashes here and there and not forgetting,their in-house politics. My mum was the first person to get beaten up by my so long conversation (more to complaining) about the misunderstanding i had with my colleagues today. While i was busy passing negative remarks,my father suddenly came into the picture and yelled, "Life is grotesque.So shut up and stop your whining!". I get pissed of course because he never before did show any kind of concern. Then,i realised for once he kicked a bit of sense into me. We often seek out an understanding of life but in truth none of us is alive for a whole life. We live in moments,snapshots of a life. To ask,"What's the meaning of life?" begs the question,"Your whole life? Your life now? Your life ten years from now? Your life ten years ago?" I often wondered what is my purpose? I often find the things that seem most filled with purpose also seem somewhat shallow. I'll just have to live with it,no matter how hard it gets.

Ohh,how can i ever forget about you who is in my every heartbeat. I love you Bf for who you are. I've been spending all of my free time with only him like as if there is no one else left on this planet. & almost all my colleagues,including my managers know about his existence. He is the sweetest when he constantly pick me up from work,cook lunch for me even on his off days,drop by at Somerset from Orchard during his one hour break when i didn't reply to his messages in the early afternoon, etc. If there is anyone that has treated me so well aside from my parents (they start slacking after i started working because they thought i should learn to be independent,pfft!), it has to be him,MY BOYFRIEND (: *kisses*

So if there is any ill-hearted,disgusting bitches (especially the out-of-figure ones) thought that they can try to be cheeky with my man,you better think again.

2010-03-21T02:21:00.000+08:00

tomorrow is just one of those mysteries in this world i will never understand.

It's currently 2.45am and i am here sitting in front of my PC,logging in into my FB again and listening to a track by Rihanna-Stupid In Love. I am now so emotionally attached to this song that i don't mind putting it on a constant playback. It has been playing for more than ten times i guess. Well,who cares. I need a break from all those rapid music because i don't see the point of tuning into it when i can't hear the words. It is just too noisy. At this hour,i am in my total relax mood with zero calls or sms for me to entertain and i put myself as 'appear offline' in MSN. I need a moment- alone. I am some sort happy that my life engine can stop running for awhile because here comes my second rest day for the week. Each passing days,i am growing even more jaded. It is suckier when i don't have great plans on such weekend. Oh well,i am already immune to it. It is soon going to be my first month serving in Zara and to be brutally honest, i do have light regrets about this situation I've put myself into. It is either I'm not ready yet for the challenge or I'm just too lazy to work for money anymore. Perhaps i think i need more time to roll with my party friends and have a taste of real nightlife. If i ever bring myself there, that would be my bloody first time. Yes,surprisingly. Bf,may i? (:

You bet he will approve me of going to such places.pfffft! The true fact is,guys are forever typical. They will hold up a big 'NO' sign every time we pop out questions about clubbing,staying overnight and etc. However,when it comes to their turn- we girls usually have a hard time stopping them. It is so fucking unfair.

Luckily,despite having such crossed opinions about each other- my Bf always try to make things better for both of us. He has tried different kind of cute ways to please me even if it would only last for a moment. & for all that priceless effort he has sincerely put in,there are times that i didn't extend my full gratitude to him.But that doesn't mean i choose not to appreciate what you've done for me.

Thank you Bf.

I love you so much.

2010-03-12T02:32:00.000+08:00

i need you now,and i'll hold on to it.

don't you let it pass you by.

I've plainly wasted my Thursday on bed sleeping until 6pm & got up for only a small portion of meal because I've lost all my appetite. Then, i caught a glimpse of Jack Neo's hot scandal affairs on the news. I seriously don't understand how these famous people lead their no-longer-ordinary life. If this is what they assumed as great publicity, well they deserve zero credit. Shame on you, dear celebrities. Well,back to my world. I'm having such a soporific moment now. Nothing really amusing has happened so far, big sigh. I'll just hold on and wait for Friday evening because I'm meeting my Bf at Dhoby Ghaut for his dance-related issue. After tomorrow, maybe no one at all will understand how much i dreaded every moment ahead of me. I have to work,work and continue working. Luckily,they offer two rest days in a week. Up to this date, i have not yet encounter any problems with my job and hopefully i could get confirmed before my fourth month. I want to make use of their benefits especially the annual leave. With that, i can go for a long,romantic vacation with my Bf. Eee-hee-hee (:

I love you, even on those days i lash out at you with a volley of coarse words. It makes me want to cry after I'm done with it because i always thought that I've been so selfish towards you. Pardon me baby. I had to act as such because I'm too afraid that i will lose the one i treasure so much - again.

2010-02-22T16:15:00.000+08:00

now i just call it lucky.

It just feels nice when your Monday isn't as blue as the previous weeks.Well,obviously something so good must have struck me & I'm more than thankful for that.finally,after about more than 200 resumes sent all over the World Wide Web,I'm shortlisted for the available position in Zara. Weeeeee! I'm feeling so gay right now and my hormones were doing the craziest tango in town when i first received this piece of fabulous news.I'm glad that I'm blessed with greater opportunities (better than Diva,of course.Pardon me, I'm still so pissed).I badly hope that history don't repeat itself,because I've felt rotten for too long already and i wish to move on.Anyway,thanks for all the well wishes (: only they know how big this deal is to me.The rest,never really cares and i don't give a damn about it.

& yes Sasabaybe,make sure you get a satisfactory answer from that ****** by Tuesday.I know how hurtful it is to be treated as such.Don't worry alright,you know you still have me who is willing to share your problems. Beep me anytime alright (:

That's that.

My next concern is always him,yes my boyfriend.He is the first to know about my happiness,even if there is anything that I'm unhappy with.It's honestly exciting when i could share my heart's content to someone who never fails to listen.That one surprised moment you made on the Orchard Central rooftop yesterday really did trigger my mind.For once,I've to start thinking carefully about how I'm going to take our relationship to a higher level. As mentioned before,I'm scared of any outcome because we are only capable of planning. Maybe i should add on one more point: I'm more worried about making or holding on to any promises. At times,it seems too nice to be true.That is when 'trust' get involved in the picture.I've been trying to shoulder both - the trust that we've built since we started and the bucket of promises you have given me.Believe me, it has not been easy.So now what I'm asking from you in return,is to love me for who i am.

Just that,nothing else.

2010-02-20T14:21:00.000+08:00

"when L I F E gets hard, screw it" .

It's such a crack, really. I got up half an hour earlier than yesterday with yet,zero resolution for the week. Well,that's pretty natural for me. Then i saw two missed calls on my cellphone:Bf (very much expected) & an office number. I was pretty sure it's going to be another set of interview. The day before,i went for Zara and it turned out quite okay. I am very confident that they will call me back for 2nd appointment next week but i can't safely vouch that I'll get the spot. hais, it is always the outcome that i fear most. So back to the anonymous call - i was darn shocked. It's the moment I've been waiting for so much! The Orange Tee Company called for an interview,like finally. They are offering close to 2K for Customer Service Executive position. I sent almost 10 resumes to them in one day during the CNY period. But,here comes the biggest disappointment.They want a candidate who can speak not only average, but at least basic phone etiquette in Chinese (gggrr!) I quickly surfed the net and look for 'English-Chinese translator' at google. I was almost there,but they are not fully convinced ):

I'm pissed too. that's why i never hesitate to apply for mandarin course at the nearest CC just now. It's like almost impossible now to get a job without mastering their language. gosh! Bf was terribly funny & also very irritating when he spoke to me in Chinese. What can i say,luck is not on my side.

out of boredom,i spent on facial for no reason. yikes,if he gets to know- he would strangle me :/

2010-02-10T19:26:00.000+08:00

In my heart there, rings a melody for you.

Well,there is just too many matters gushing in and out of my undersized brain lately but it is almost impossible to jot it all down. so far there is never a day that i could smell complete joy and yet my previous Super-Bitch employer is not making it any easier for me. She always made me wish her mum had been infertile. gggrrr! They made me totally realised that working for their brands (my case,i worked for Diva) has been such a major disaster. I had to chase after my own salary since last week which is supposed to be one of their responsibilities to do so on time. I am dead disappointed. I was screaming on the phone the other day like a fisher woman with a bad case of PMS just to get a satisfactory answer from them about my cheque. Whatever it is,i made it crystal clear to them that i would take legal action against the company if they still fail to pay me by this coming Friday.I can be fairly diplomatic when i choose to which is not very often,actually. Fuck it,it is such a swell to liaise with such losers.

Hais.(take a deep breath) anyway,i am somehow curious about how my V'day going to be. But it doesn't really matter actually because i see beautiful moments each time he is there for me.To me,that is more than special. He gave me another Disney character few weeks ago,Winnie The Pooh.Now i am wondering from where he got those ideas of buying me soft toys, it's either i appear like a small kid whenever I'm with him or he purposely want to jam my overloaded room because he knows exactly how messy it is.Lols, Baby i love you laaa (:

2010-01-19T04:04:00.000+08:00

ours is not one of those bad romance.

hello there,once again. i wonder how is my every pretty people in my petite world progressing because it seems like I've been gone for ages. i miss them all,seriously. as for myself,i am still pretty much occupied with work,work and work. my days got worse during the new year when everyone is supposed to be having fun and starting to list down their 2010's resolution. i beyond hate myself at that moment for all the mistakes that I've sinfully committed again. ever since then,I'd done nothing but worry that every turn of life's wheel would bring yet another obstacle into my path, & of course, it was the worrying and struggle that had always made life so vividly real to me. previously,i thought that my day was winding down but actually it has just begun. so for all the positive changes that I've promised to fulfill,definitely have to roll together with very huge sacrifices. it sucks, yes to the core. now,i have secured a job that requires me to be on task for 6 days a week and on irregular timings. i almost wanted to leave but it turns out differently. I'm still one of those divas, who is painfully crying for mercy. okay, i shall remain neutral now because i find that my entire lengthy paragraph is too melodramatic.

luckily,my darkened life slowly softens into something much more pleasant when Bf is there for me for this past four months. he is more than my boyfriend. he is more than just a friend. he is someone who I love and would till the end. when i said "I think we should be apart" that is the day i realised that i broke his heart. i just want you to remember all the fun times we had and how we said we would be together forever and ever.

love you monyet.

(thanks B for the priceless chocolate, i love it when you buy random gifts, hehe)

lastly, Happy Belated Birthday to my 3rd sister who has just turned 13 on the 9th of January. & for being such a genious (she scored 239 for PSLE), i gave her an Ipod Touch. *winks*

2009-11-24T18:15:00.000+08:00

Do not care 'bout the pain in front of me

because I'm just trying to be happy.

yay-yay! i absolutely can't wait to start my paper-round tomorrow. hopefully it would turn out great for me. I've had my beautiful sleep until 2pm everyday since last few weeks,deliciously home-cooked food for lunch and dinner and not forgetting every possible teevee series on whichever channels because i had nothing else to do. now,I'm beginning to grow sick and tired of lepak-ing at home each dragging days. I'm grateful that it didn't take me so long to confirm a position in retail again. i die-die have to make sure that i stick to my resolution for real this time round. hugely because,considering that i happily placed a bet with my third sister previously. i promised her an IPOD Touch if her aggregate for PSLE this year is above 225, i think. it seems that she is highly confident about her results this coming Thursday. darn,i really am pulling the trigger into my own head. never mind,she is just born lucky to have a thoughtful sister like me. *lols* after I'm done with that, I've to set aside a lump sum of $ for what is necessary. i shall just keep it in mind first.

as usual, Bf quenched his thirst for new released movies with me yesterday evening. we watched 'Raging Phoenix'. Masham found it terribly good,yet to me it's just another typical fighting show. our Monday together was pretty short, yet it still is one of the sweetest moments =]

love you giler.

2009-11-20T18:14:00.001+08:00

Happy 3rd month,Masham (:

People are funny. Faces that are imperfect are said to have character and human charm. Most probably, that is why i fell for him at first. Gradually,we both are able to witness our own good and flaws. He sure could now predict that deep down,i am a weak person. I yielded to him in everything. and i still am, according to my mood swing. Luckily for me,whenever my protest was delivered in rapid fire, he countered it in measured tones. yet,he isn't perfect. in fact,no one is. but slowly,he proved to me that behind all these imperfections - we can still work for more joy and laughter each passing day.

at times, life is all about simplicity.

2009-11-19T13:46:00.000+08:00

I'll be that good girl that you can't put down.

Fcuk. I am growing jaded by the minute. I effing hate my temporary job at Robinsons. It definitely is never going to suit my taste buds. so today i said I'm ill, but I think they know I'm just malingering. whatever, i brutally don't care. I basically got paid for standing like a living zombie- doing absolutely nothing. I can't even sell the items skilfully because it is not my favourite department. household linen- what the hell. & worse, I've to travel all the way down to Raffles City knowing that i could have gotten a nearer location which offers me the same hourly rate. Darn. However, i did make friends with a few. that's positive. at the very least, I'm less scared now. yeah,I'm fully aware though that everywhere is turning into a deep shit hole- jobs slowly depleting and you should just grab what's being offered. but i swear i would commit 3rd degree homicide if i have to stay any longer in such soporific ambience. geez! Oh well, I'm going to be one of the Divas pretty soon anyway. that's what i call pure goodness (: no doubt,everything seemed to be happening in slow motion but I'm thankful that it is not turning more bitter than what I've to go through at the moment. & i know no matter how ugly things would turn out to be,my Masham will always be there. Eee-hee-hee-hee =D maybe he will never understand that my every kiss is actually a promise that you haven't seen the last of me yet.there is more where this come from. & please don't hate me when i start blabbering about my ex-boyfriends.it all came out like word vomit- seriously unintentional. after being beaten with such cruel past, it is honestly not easy to forget. I'm glad, you listened. aku sayaaaaaaaaaaang kau *winks*

ehh by the way, I've not heard from my girlfriends for like ages already. after i bumped into my homie last few days, i realised how much i missed her and the rest. it's bloody torturing when i have to temporarily abort my girls-outing plans due to no-money circumstances. gggrrr!

2009-11-15T16:54:00.001+08:00

My sun may never rise the way it did with you,& he may never kiss me the way that you'd do but at least he makes me feel like a part of his life.At least he doesn't make me cry. I know i can call him mine.Though when I call him on the phone I never feel butterflies, I know that I can trust.He'll always give me love

& I know mine will grow for him in time

200909 (:

2009-11-15T03:57:00.000+08:00

fresh jump start into- perhaps a less rocky world.

I'm once again virtually existent- on a brand new World Wide Web page. i suddenly realised that i must start over with a clean slate. i didn't want anymore grotty history,I've had enough of those for a while. i still am breathing and life-threateningly lazy at all times. I'm obviously still the same,old me even though few of my pure substances fail to notice. they keep thinking that I've somehow changed just because i rarely send them 'hi! how are you doing babe/dude?' smses or ask them out like our yesterdays. hais,cummon' homies. you people really have to stop assuming things that never existed in the first place.i may be spending most of my time with my precious boyfriend now,but it doesn't mean I've grown mean towards any of you. anyway,being in a relationship ain't easy too. i hate to use this word 'regret' but unfortunately I'm not good at cheating- especially my own feelings. honestly yeah,there are certain times i feel like it never should have begun. pardon me but life is truly never fair. one moment i wish i could get back my single life,can stop caring and worrying about such maudlin affairs. but on the very next minute,i would feel abandoned. i thought of my life,of the love that i had possessed and let go of- but none of the broken ones had a happy ending. then i grow jaded picking up boyfriends on passionate whims and then passionately dropping them again. now,I'll just have to stick to one. he isn't particularly attractive,but he isn't ugly either. what surprised me most is that we definitely have opposite interests. he is a dancer- whatever hip hop thingy and I'm obviously not. this extremely huge gap between us has not yet created any undesired misunderstandings,i just feel out of place. luckily so far,it has been quite beautiful- not fully. i shall see how it goes.

just a short recap of my Saturday,because I'm rather forgetful. Bf had to attend camp in the afternoon for bloody no reason. so after it ended,i met him at Causeway Point for late lunch and another movie 'My Girlfriend Is An Agent'. it was terrifyingly funny! Eee-hee-hee-hee =] we've watched almost everything, except for My Sister's Keeper. i bet it's already over because i didn't see its show times anymore.why am i always a little too late? pfft.

okay,it's already 5.15am and i forgot to give my Bf a call. woops,sorry sayang. goodnite,love you.